Quotes 1 till 19 of 19.
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A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.
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A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.
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An ardent supporter of the hometown team should go to a game prepared to take offense, no matter what happens.
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Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.
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As for me, except for an occasional heart attack, I feel as young as I ever did.
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Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.
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Drawing on my fine command of the language, I said nothing.
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Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with, that it's compounding a felony.
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He [Robert Benchley] and I had an office so tiny that an inch smaller and it would have been adultery.
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I can't bring myself to say, 'Well, I guess I'll be toddling along.' It isn't that I can't toddle. It's just that I can't guess I'll toddle.
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I do most of my work sitting down; that's where I shine.
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I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.
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It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up, because by that time I was too famous.
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Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about
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The biggest obstacle to professional writing is the necessity for changing a typewriter ribbon.
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The free-lance writer is a man who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps.
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The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
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